For you…

“For you, there’ll be no more crying.
For you, the sun will be shining.” (Songbird by Fleetwood Mac)

I once read that children who are born in warring tribes are often abandoned at birth to create an intense instinct of fear and aggression.  “Emerging research suggest parents who chronically neglect their children increase the chance that the child will develop aggressive and delinquent tendencies in adolescence.” Click here to read more.

Although as a child I felt neglected, early on my heart went the opposite direction towards that of love and a want to connect with others.

As a mom, to undo my early childhood memories, I loved my daughter intensely and was overprotective. Whenever she cried, I ran to sooth her. I also taught her early on not to cry. If she fell I told her to “brush it off.” One time when she broke her leg, afterwards, with tears she said, “Mama, I tried to get up and brush it off, but I couldn’t.”

Now as an adult she has learned that there are difficulties in life and, as she lives far away, I cannot give her a hug. Although I feel sad that I cannot comfort her, I know the strength that she is developing from learning how to resolve problems on her own.

As a parent I am learning to let go.